Barbie Now Has Tattoos?

piercings are next

What do we have here?

From being an innocent and sweet toy for girls, Mattel decided to bring things up a notch and parents are not happy about it.

Barbie has been around for 50 years and was distributed in every shape and form possible. She’s been a princess, a mermaid, and a NASCAR fan? What the eff were they thinking? This time around, America’s little sweetheart is inked up. That’s right, Barbie now comes with tattoos!

Mattel states it's up to the kids to attach the stickers where they see fit. The tattoos include hearts, stars, and butterflies. Too bad, there are no skulls and "Ken 4 Life" tattoos.

I wouldn’t be surprised if they make a queer version of Ken…oh they already did, the one with the “magic ring” around his neck...geez what’s happening with the world we’re living in?

The Hype: If you are to design a new and talking version of Barbie or Ken to be distributed in the market, what would it be?

a. Paris Hiltonesque-Barbie complete with a toy videocam and night vision googles so you can see her when the light goes out. Says "Mine is hotter than Kim Kardashian's."
b. Barbie and Ken versions of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. They say "We're cheesy and we're dumb, you've just wasted your money on us."
c. A hip Chris Brown version of Ken with a punching-action feature. Screams "I'm going to kill you!"
d. A pregnant Nadya Suleman doll with removable belly that exposes 8 babies inside her. Speaks "I need your donations, I need your money, I need your taxes."

Buzzer Beater: Forget it. Like their human counterparts - these toys are worthless!

Chris Brown Hit With Two Felony Charges

bozo

Chris Brown was hit by the L.A. County DA with two felony charges that include assault and making criminal threats.

The 19-year-old Brown is set to make his first appearance in a Los Angeles courtroom today at 3:30 PM where he'll be arraigned.

The charges are made due to an incident that occurred the night before the Grammys. It's been widely reported that Brown's girlfriend, 21-year-old singer Rihanna, was the alleged victim. It is being confirmed by court papers that Brown is charged with the assault of victim "Robyn Fenty", Rihanna's real name.

According to Los Angeles’ FOX 11, which claims to have obtained the notes from a search warrant in the case, Rihanna read a lengthy text message from a woman on Brown's phone, which led to an argument. Brown then allegedly tried to force his girlfriend out of the Lamborghini, and hit her head against the passenger window.

Brown then punched the singer while still driving and blood filled Rihanna's mouth. He allegedly told her, "I'm going to beat the ---- out of you when we get home." Rihanna called her assistant and left a message saying, "I am on my way home. Make sure the cops are there when I get there." The police notes say that prompted Brown to reply: "You just did the stupidest thing ever. I'm going to kill you."

The report also states that Brown bit Rihanna and put her in a headlock, and that she almost lost consciousness.

The Hype: It's getting more and more sickening as the untold stories about the incident are being unraveled. If given the chance to do the things Brown did to Rihanna, what are you going to pick?

a. Hit his stupid head against the passenger window.
b. Punch his annoying face and make him bleed.
c. Bite his sorry face off.
d. Headlock him like there's no tomorrow.

Buzzer Beater: I'll be leaving this to you guys, give your take on the matter. I just find the choices soft and gentle, even ramming the punk with his Lamborghini is lame.

Octuplet "Dad" Shows Up

he wants his own website and donations too...and he looks serious about it

He claims he dated Nadya Suleman for three years and he could be the biological father of Nadya Suleman’s octuplets.

Denis Beaudoin told Chris Cuomo in an exclusive interview with "Good Morning America” that he donated his sperm to Nadya Suleman three times without asking questions because he was young and in love.

Beaudoin said he thought it was "out of the ordinary" when she asked him to donate. "But I cared about her so much. And I mean, we were, we were in love. I mean, I loved Nadya very much," he stated.

Beaudoin said he and Suleman had a three-year relationship from 1997 to 1999, though he and Suleman never discussed marriage, Beaudoin said when he donated the sperm he thought it would be part of "starting a family" together at some point.

He said that at the time she first approached him about donating sperm, Suleman told him that she had ovarian cancer and was unable to conceive without the help of a doctor. He also stated that they had an amicable parting, but said he never heard anything more about Suleman undergoing in vitro fertilization or trying to become pregnant.

Beaudoin said he was "shocked and surprised" when he first learned that Suleman had delivered octuplets on Jan. 23.

The Hype: If you were Denis Beaudoin, what's the very first thing that went inside your head before the interview?

a. "I'm gonna be famous! I'm gonna be rich! Thank you taxpayers!!!"
b. "I wish I'm in Oprah then do the couch jump on the part I say I'm in love...darn!"
c. "My sperm really is that potent? I'm a sex god!!!"
d. "I need to surgically change my face to look like Brad Pitt after this."

Buzzer Beater: I'll go for D but it should be based on Brad Pitt's character Benjamin Button - the wrinkly one.

Supermodel Adriana Lima Elopes with NBA Star Marko Jarić

"highly paid NBA superstars, eat your hearts out!"

You lucky SOB! (mumbling)

Victoria's Secret favorite and supermodel hottie Adriana Lima has settled down on Valentine's Day after eloping with the Memphis Grizzlies' Marko Jarić in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. The two became engaged in June of last year, on Adriana's 27th birthday.

The Hype: She famously claimed before that she is still a virgin and she would wait until marriage to have sex. She even told GQ Magazine that "Sex is for after marriage. I don’t care. They have to respect that this is my choice. If there’s no respect, that means they don’t want me."

What's your take on her statement?

a. Lenny Kravitz, her ex-boyfriend, got ahead of Marko and already did the deed.
b. Pure BS! 27 year old virgins are sooo 17th century.
c. It's true, it's true...I saw a UFO this morning.
d. Some things should stay untold just like Victoria's mysterious secret.

Buzzer Beater: whatever the answer is, he is still a lucky SOB! (cursing)

The 2009 Oscars: The Best and The Worst Dresses

It's the time of the year again.

From simple to daring, from elegant to complete disaster, stars spend thousands to look their best or to be the ridicule of the fashion world - there's a very thin line that separates the two.

The Oscars is the annual grandprix of films but it also showcases the best in fashion - from the designers to the stars that wear their creations. The red carpet pits the best and the worst in the business of style. If dresses are given Oscar nods, they should take home the award.

elegance

The Hype: The following celebrities are the nominees for the worst-dressed award:

annoyance

a. Beyonce Knowles for her role as a matador in the movie "El Jay-Z's Toro".
b. Heidi Klum in the futuristic film "Space Navy SEALs".
c. Jessica Biel as the table napkin in "The Timberlake House".

Buzzer Beater: and the Oscars goes to...Jessica Biel! Now wipe those tears, will you?

Chris Brown's Wrigley Advertisement Got Suspended

I hope you get your a*s whooped in jail

Leading chewing gum makers Wrigley suspended a commercial featuring Chris Brown after the R&B singer was arrested on suspicion of attacking a woman and it’s even widely reported to be Rihanna, his singer girlfriend.

The assault news came out after the couple canceled separate performances at the recent Grammy Awards. Brown, was free on $50,000 bail a day after.

Wrigley said in a statement it was "concerned by the serious allegations" made against Brown and the company said that while Brown should be afforded due legal process "we have made the decision to suspend the current advertising featuring Brown...until the matter is resolved."

Things are not looking good for Brown because aside from the suspension of his advertisement, he could face up to three years in prison if convicted.

The Hype: This case is serious and shouldn't be taken lightly but if you own Wrigley, what step are going to take if Chris Brown is proven guilty?

a. Change the jingle song from Brown's "Forever" to Michael Jackson's "Beat It".
b. Make him chew your product while in prison, everyday for 3 years - promotion-wise.
c. Beat him up until he's bubblegum soft.
d. Hit him hard with an umbrella.

Buzzer Beater: Tough one...I go for C or D but I'll make sure I take a video of it - promotion-wise.

Bar Rafaeli is the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover Model

Nothing!!!

I love this time of the year! The 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue is out and this year’s cover girl is none other than Bar Rafaeli. There are a lot of great-looking and hot babes and supermodels out there but I'm mighty glad they picked the most beautiful and hottest one. Now I'm more envious of Leonardo DiCaprio, he painted an image of Kate Winslet with only a necklace on, he's one of the best actors around, he has a rackful of awards and he gets to have his way with his girlfriend Bar Rafaeli. Some people are born lucky.

The Hype: If given the chance, who would you pick among the given choices to grace the cover of the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue if we have to exclude Bar Rafaeli?

a. Queen Lebron James
b. the present Jessica Simpson
c. Sarah Palin
d. Amy Winehouse

Buzzer Beater: It's a no-brainer, I'd go for Jessica Simpson because fat is the new fad. (cough) Right Kelly Clarkson (cough)?

Streakstoppers

Rondo: "Pierce does that bump thing only when he's behind me"

Fresh from their unblemished 6-game road trip that concluded with meetings against the Eastern Conference’s top teams, the denizens of Los Angeles have something to rejoice about heading to the league’s mid-season festivity, the All-Star Break 2009 in Phoenix, Arizona.

Earning the reputation of streakbusters or streakstoppers, whichever sounds cooler, the softies of last year’s NBA Finals are no longer the push-overs they were branded for folding on Game 6 against the bullies from Boston. After snapping their 19-game winning streak on Christmas Day, they stopped another run by the Celts on their own turf, the very same building Bryant, Gasol, Odom and the rest of the Laker crew packed their things up even before the game ended last year. Losing Bynum due to injury, the Lakers went through bumps and bruises from the Celtics’ top physical play and iced the opponent’s hot streak of 12 straight wins in an overtime thriller.

Then came the last of their series of games away from Staples Center. Boasting a 23-O homestand, The Cleveland Cavaliers seemed to be invincible in Quicken Loans Arena. A lot were expecting the match will be epic due to the clash of the game’s two best players but it was no contest. Bynum was in the sidelines and Kobe was nursing an IV but the team from Tinseltown gave the Cavs a dose of their own medicine by clamping it up on the second half, limiting them to only 30 points even they trailed for 10 midway through the game but the defining moments of the match were Lebron James’ pathetic 5-20 showing and the reemergence of Lamar Odom, the athletic 6’10, 250 lbs lefty, who caused nightmares to the four players sent to guard him. When everything was said and done, the 23-0 is now 23-1.

Streakbusters or Streakstoppers, they are the Los Angeles Lakers.

The Hype: Why did the Cleveland Cavaliers lose to the road-weary and Bynum-less Lakers even with a flu-stricken Kobe?

a. Lebron James is nothing if defended far from the basket.
b. Lebron James is nothing compared to Kobe Bryant.
c. Lebron James is nothing without his crab dribble BS.
d. Lebron James is a sissy.

"you refs haven't seen my lobster dribble yet"

Buzzer Beater: All of the above! Cry James and Cavs fans, your overrated basketball hero is the king of wuss!